Anonymous Story #20

        The summer of 2009 I started losing weight. I wasn't even aware of how skinny I was until my dad told me how bony I looked. I did NoT have an eating disorder. July 25th I was brought to Edwards hospital for labs showing my blood sugar was in the 500's... It's suppose to be under 120... My pancreas had stopped working and I became a type 1 diabetic. From that moment on my eating, exercise, and life became increasingly more difficult. I began to eat more food when my blood level would drop to low and as months passed and my body went through changes so did my insulin rates. I always felt sick and tired and on top of that I was gaining so much weight. It was at high school when I really started caring and paying attention to what I was eating. I progressively got worse and would even go to the gym twice in one day. I was a exercis-o-holic! Then I would use a calorie counter to subtract everything I ate and when I didn't break even with calories or I felt like I ate to much I would self harm with rage. I was so upset that I wasn't even losing weight and it became my obsession. I continued to count calories but the worse I felt about myself the more more I wanted to stop eating. One night after eating a huge meal I was way above calories so I went for a jog but after I felt so sick that I threw up. A lightbulb had gone off in my head and I thought that instead of starving myself I could still eat but then throw it all up later. This terrible eating cycle was partially recognized by my parents and I was so depressed and isolated from all of my friends I ended up cracking after a terrible relapse and then they helped me make the first steps toward recovery.